Codependent No…Shit
Please show me the way out of where I want to stay.
First and foremost, as I’m sure you’ve guessed, yes my title is a play on Melody Beattie’s book and cultural movement, “Codependent No More”. Melody has placed herself, and rightfully so, at the top of the list in helping us understand codependency. A daunting task made even more so being there is neither a specific definition nor diagnosis.
In this piece, I plan to highlight some key points presented on Codependency and simply add my two cents. Not to improve on the work, just to offer my perspective.
“Few things exemplify toxic codependency more than helping the person that just shot you reload the gun.” -Marc S. Boriosi
I won’t lie, I was in a pretty dark place personally when I wrote that quote. I am better now…mostly. I added “toxic” to codependency on purpose there. I believe as human beings living in a world of connection we are all codependent to some degree. As infants, we are 100% dependent on someone to survive. That innate primal requirement for selfless care is pretty hard to shake. Interesting that Eastern Philosophy defines attachment as the root of all suffering, but without attachment, we wouldn’t exist to get to suffer. So, in that sense, I suppose they’re spot on.
